Women and Cooking

I have been raised believing that women should know how to cook. They have always told me that a girl must be good in the kitchen. I don't remember how I perceived it with my nine-year-old mind back then. What I see now is that that girl has stayed out of the kitchen as much as she could.

I always hear people saying that I should learn how to cook before I get married. I have always argued that my husband would be a good cook. In addition to that, I have stood on my ground that I will learn the moment I get there. My mom has often told me that she learned how to cook after she and my dad got married. She did not know a single recipe, even how to cook rice or sinaing. However, my mom is an innovative cook and one of the best I have known. I look at this with much hope. I could make the sinaing! Hahaha.

I have a picture in my mind of breakfasts in bed with flowers and kisses. In the picture, I am the one being served with the breakfast and my sweet husband the one serving it. My uncle, who first heard about this, commented that it is not a husband I was looking for but a chimoy. Perhaps that is how many people view this especially in our society that upholds patriarchy even to this modern age of equality between the sexes.

I am not a feminist, contrary to what many people believe. I have just come to open my mind to the evolution (if it's how some people call it) of the roles of men and women. Cooking has always been attached to the descendants of Eve. A maxim that says, "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," has become a passe already. There has arisen ways to a man's heart in the modern times. Knowledge, conviction, honesty, confidence and independence of a woman are the few attributes that have become the basis of men in choosing their lifetime partners. The domestic skills of women as the only qualifications in becoming a good wife is already an anachronism.

However, this does not mean that those women who hold such attributes are considered less superior than their modern-day counterparts. I remember the movie Mona Lisa's Smile which starred Julia Roberts, Julia Stiles and Kristen Dunst. It portrays the evolution of women's roles in society and at the same time making a balance to conserve the original purpose of women. In addition to this, it has shown that women, like men, are also unique. They have different perceptions of life as well, and that standing to such ideals do not make them lesser individuals. Perhaps, the society has to accept this, too.

Nonetheless, I also want to prepare meals and learn how to cook. It is just that I do not want to be limited to it, and my whole personality be judged because of it. My mom has started zero when it comes to her skills in the kitchen, but she has learned and become a master of it. But when she comes to a point of being tired doing it, my dad cooks for her. He does not judge her then nor love her less because of it. I hope that the society also may view women this way somehow. I hope that they do not relate women to cooking as much as many people still do.